Me: Today we are going to listen to a piece of music that has no words but tells a story. Do you have any ideas how that's possible?
Students: Blank stares
Me: Do you have any ideas about how music can tell a story without using words?
Student 1: Beat
Me: I'm not sure what you mean. Can you elaborate.
Student 1: Shoulder shrug
I get "beat" as a first answer to anything I ask about music. I have no idea what they're trying to say because I'm not good with mind reading, especially when I think there is probably a bunch of Taki chips gumming up their neural transmitters.
Student 2: Play
Student 3 responds to that answer by telling the air that he once saw a play.
Me: Can you expand upon that answer? Are you trying to say that plays have no words? Are you trying to say that the music is a play?
Student 3: I don't know. Maybe. Yeah. Play.
Me: So, if I acted out a play without using words, how would that work? I stand there and emote wordlessly.
Class: Giggles
Me; Anyone else have any ideas?
Student 4: High and low
That's the second answer I get after I explain that beat is not the correct answer.
Me: I need to have some complete sentences. I do not know what you mean when you answer me with one word.
Student 4: Those are two words.
Me: Actually those are three words, but those are three words in search of a sentence. Can you lead them to one?
Class: more blank stares.
I tell the class the story of Peer Gynt and lead them through a movement activity to the music. I ask the question again after we have finished.
Me: So how did the music tell the story?
Student 5: There was running in it.
Me: How do you know?
Student 5: Because you ran
Me: Yes, that's true, but did something in the music indicate a chase or running?
Student 5: Yes. You told us the story.
Me: Listen carefully to my question. I repeat my question a little louder, the way people shout at a person when they find out he is deaf.
Student 5: Beat
Me: Constantly repeating the same questions has depleted my energy source. I am going to stare at the sun.
Class: There are no windows in the room.
Me: I know. See you later.
While looking at a rhythm exercise that we were going to perform with Feurfest Polka I was pointing out some of the directions and having the students read them on rhythm syllables. The meter is in 4 and there were two measures of rest with repeat signs and directions that said to repeat them four times.
Me: How many beats of rest do you see here?
Student 1: 1,2,3,4,5,6,7.....7
Me: Count again.
Student 1: 1, 2,3,4,5,6,7 ohhhh-8
Me: Very good. The directions indicate that those 8 beats will be repeated 4 times for a total of how many beats:
Student 2: Eight
Me: I point to the two measures and say that there are eight beats here, but they will be repeated four times. Eight can not possibly be the right answer.
Student 3. One
Me: How could one possibly be an answer when there we just counted out 8 beats.
Student 3: Eight
Me: No. I said no the first time and I won't change my mind.
Student 4 : Sixteen
Me: Warmer, but still no.
Student 5: Eight
Me: Nope and still nope.
Student 6: Seven
Me: PLEASE listen to my question and then do NOT raise your hand until I say ok. I put my thinking cap on ( I have a stupid little beanie with the words Do Not Disturb. I Am Thinking Now.)
I dramatically pull off the hat.
Student 8: Eight
Me: Oy
Student 9: Thirty-two.
Me: I faint
